We all play many roles in life.

We play roles at work.

No matter what position you hold in an organization, or as an entrepreneur or consultant, you may play roles that are fully aligned and that you enjoy, and you may have roles that have been imposed on you, or that you volunteered for, that are not so satisfying.

We play roles at home and in our personal relationships.

We often play roles by default — such as being the one who takes care of shopping and meal preparation, or handling finances, or arranging children’s schedules, or being responsible for a host of matters related to aging parents.

While we may find some roles suit us well, we may feel saddled by others.

Taking the time to assess the roles you play and how they are working for you can help you to recognize the ways you spend time that is fulfilling and meaningful, and ways that you may be feeling resentful or overburdened.

When you gain insight about the roles you play, you will be positioned to make decisions that best support your wellbeing.

Here are questions that can help you find clarity.

4 steps to sharpen your awareness

Most people drift day to day and operate in roles that may range from making them feel gratified and proud, to mildly annoyed, or sadly, to playing roles that are deeply problematic.

That drifting can go in for months and years, and when things are less than rewarding it takes a toll. 

I invite you to take a few minutes and ask yourself some meaningful clarifying questions, so that you can live with awareness and make changes if you spot issues you have allowed to continue without considering alternatives.

Take the time to answer the questions with care, They can shed meaningful light on many of the ways you spend your time and use your precious energy.

1. Take an inventory of the many roles you play.

What roles am I playing in my professional life?

What roles am I playing in my personal life, in my family, and with friends?

What roles am I playing in my civic life, or as a volunteer, or in my community?

2. Assess your satisfaction with the roles you play.

Which of my roles do I like — and maybe treasure?

Which of my roles would I drop, or hand off, if I could?

Did I choose the roles I like?

Did I choose the roles I do not want?

Did I default to playing some of the roles, or accept some roles, and now regret some of my decisions?

3. Consider the size of the roles you play.

How much time and energy do the key roles I play demand of me?

Have I accepted, or volunteered for, bigger roles or more demanding roles than I am comfortably able to handle?

Are there roles I yearn to expand?

4. Expand your assessment.

Am I focused on the outcomes I want in all of the roles I play?

How do I show up in various roles? Am I excited? Bold? Reluctant? Do I inspire others?

Do I invite others in or play solo?

Do I do the bare minimum, devote an ideal amount of effort, or do I go beyond what is required, expected, or necessary?

Do some of my roles rob me of other opportunities for satisfaction and joy?

Optimize your path forward

Now that you have clarity about the roles you currently play, you can keep the roles that are positive, expand on some that are more limited than you wish, and takes steps to change — minimize, reduce, or eliminate — the roles that are not aligned for you.

When you commit to the roles that matter, and show up fully — boldly, with an open heart, a generous spirit — you will have your biggest, most meaningful and rewarding impact.

As you move forward with awareness and clarity, and regularly commit to shaping the roles you play with intention, you will build a future that optimizes satisfaction and reduces stress.

And you can ask for help to move into your best future with without the struggle of finding your way alone. Having an outside perspective and guidance can speed your progress.

I always welcome you to reach out.

With love,

How we can work together

Visit the Creators of Change page on my site

In these fraught times, it can be hard to know how to take action to preserve our democracy and human rights. There is a growing list of resources you can learn about and support.
Check out the Creators of Change page